This is the Help Desk; a career that relies upon the facts that computers are crap and people are stupid. The stories you are about to read are true. Some names have been changed to protect my employment but others have not so as to implicate the guilty.
I'm flipping through channels and "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" is on. It's the middle of November, guys! It's not even Thanksgiving yet! I mean, really! Can't you wait until December? Do you need that much of a jump on the so-called holiday season?